Tough Love (my three sons)

Until recently I had one son.  One son who for better or worse has learned, both directly and indirectly from me what it will mean to be a man.  God bless that boy, because while I don’t consider myself a total bustout, I don’t consider myself a total success either.  Since I was the oldest, my mother and father were not above telling me that they were learning as they went.  I feel like that with my oldest son… and I guess this is both an apology and an explanation.

But that aside, any father with a spine running down his back wants to give his children things to prepare them for this world.  For that matter, any father with a spine running down his back wants to make certain that his son is prepared for this world.  As a father, I want my son(s) to do whatever they want in this world.

I inserted that clip at the top because around the three to four minute mark that father and son have a moment.  It is I guess, the apology and the explanation.

They call it tough love.  If applied properly it can motivate, nurture and teach your child without coddling them.  If applied improperly, it can be hurtful, isolating, and destroy your child’s spirit before you realize the damage you have inflicted.  And knowing that risk, a man will risk the down side of child rearing to separate his own weaknesses from his children.  Recognizing your shortcomings in  your children is frustrating to say the least.  Correcting your shortcomings in your children without damaging them is something like a rebirth of self.  But more importantly it is building your children to be a better whatever it is they want to be.  The family DNA re-engineered and improved upon.  The lesson gets passed on to the next generation, and so on and so on and so on (son).  Money is not what we seek…we just want to be…beautiful and free.

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